Reasons to continue existing…despite the fact that my only activity is TV

I look forward to watching TV.  I get out of bed to watch TV.  I feel listless, restless, irritable and markedly less happy without TV.  But there are a few second places to be had in my life.  Lets picture it as a pyramid of “activities that make R happy.”  It’s very steep.  The apex is Monday PM programming.  New episodes of Intervention and then Obsessed.

One Second Place slot goes to planning my future in Europe/Germany/Berlin and collecting reasons for my theoretical ASAP relocation.  ’Theoretical A.S.A.P.’  because it appears I must attend college for one more year before I can get any respect for the previous 3 years of blinding disorientation.  Otherwise I would already be living in Europe/Germany/Berlin because of this:

Half of a Second Place spot goes to salivating over sneakers so Kicks and Cake only makes sense.  New and Used sneaks flea market style served with cake(s).  I’ve already dreamt up this event.  I have been dreaming of an occasion such as this.  My soul is in attendance.  I have already drooled over the cake and the kicks.  Retro sneaks and new releases at crazy prices (imagine, Supras at a reasonable price).  Eat cake and purchase sneakers.  There’s an after party too.  If you’re down, lets get there.  I can learn how to fly a plane.  I’ll take the risk of crashing into the Atlantic just to be at Kicks and Cake.

Desperation kicks in (no pun intended!) when I consider that with my luck, the whole thing will be cancelled and all records of it erased by next year when I wouldn’t be risking a watery grave to get there.  And taking flying lessons would really damage my relationship with my flat screen.  Can’t risk that.  AH, more information can be found here. FYI:  you can also sell old kicks which is just so thoroughly and wonderfully German that I absolutely must take part!

Another Second Place goes to Dlisted.  Some people, i.e. my co-blogette, think Dlisted is too mean and nasty.  This opinion rings a bell with me because of my experience with TV in Budapest.  The very definition of vulgarity, in short, and I understood nothing.  But that didn’t stop me from watching it.  More vulgar than Dlisted, I had no fear that the V-ness would rub off on me, it was Hungarian and I am not.  With Dlisted on the other hand, I am knowingly complicit in their distaste for 98% of the public arena.  I agree and I like it.  D is cruel, but the subject proves worthy.  For example, Kate MUST quit with that haircut, Dlisted is tired of hating on it. Asymmetrical is in, spiky-filthy-blonde-butchered-in-back-hot-mess is not.  Plus, it’s had ample opportunity to grow out/cease and desist, and she just won’t let it.

On the other hand, Dlisted speaks volumes where I cannot about goddesses/the goddess, Grace Jones.  She’s Jamaican.  She’s an androgyne.  But the only other description of her is goddess or world-ruler. Thank you Dlisted for giving me the voice when I couldn’t speak.  By the way, Grace Jones is yet another Second Place taker.

Where Dlisted and I part ways is on those celebrities that I support for NO REASON.  I can’t deny my emotions.  I like Lindsay Lohan originally because of The Parent Trap.  As a child, I hoped I would meet my long-lost sister at camp…even though I only went to camp twice, I hated it both times, and only came back with Athlete’s foot.  But Linds gave me the idea– I can’t help that I like her!  She also broke out of that sickening ginger look and staked her fame on not being a ginge…despite being a ginge.  I give her mad props and I don’t blame her for chasing Samantha to London and having a public meltdown.  People chase DJs. Isn’t that what they signed up for in the whole fame package?  And who among us has not cried beer tears? AND who among us has not worn leggings as pants and tried to get away with it?

So some people don’t have as much sympathy as I do, Dlisted included, but what of it?  Anyway, Lindsay is a successful B.

-R